“Does he like me” turns into “Do they like me” when you’ve graduated high school(/college, for some) and find yourself Real Worlding it out as you interview up a storm. Below, my summary of the different types of interviews that may sour or color your career development.

You suck.
You’re late. You don’t bring your resume. Your personalities clash. Even if they did give you a callback, you wouldn’t want to be reminded that you ever shared the same breathing space as the person who originally interviewed you.

Going through the motions.
You’ve done the research, you show up on time, you present yourself well. Even though you’re confident you’re capable of executing the job, you leave feeling surprisingly less than enthused by the position. Maybe there seemed to be a lack of a “fit” when you shook hands with those who were asking the questions, or maybe the job description seemed a whole lot more interesting when you first read it off of Craigslist. You don’t care whether you end up getting it or not, which troubles you.

The tease.
Things go great. You are told you are the best candidate to have walked in so far. You’ve already been asked and given your availability for a final interview with the head honcho of the office. Then you hear nothing. You send them paper and electronic thank you cards. You hear nothing. You e-mail them in a week offering to give some time to freelancing if they need it. You hear nothing.

Kaput.

The extended tease.
Things go great. You hit it off with the interviewer to the point where you’re talking about Christian Siriano and trannies, and it all fits in with the context. The interviewer is refreshed to have met someone who knows the space so well, and you are relieved to be discussing nuances of the position without having to sugarcoat anything.

One problem that is out of your hands: You have interviewed with the interim supervisor of your position, but that interviewer is in the middle of hiring who would be your full-time boss. The time period of the search is indefinite. The interviewer lays it out on the table that no expectations on a response time can be set.

One thing going for you: The recruiter who found you is all about getting you in that spot. You have one other person backing you up in the ring. They assure you that feedback on your interview was very positive, and that they have been told to “keep [you] warm.”

Until then, you wait. You send a couple of random “I’m still here! Here’s an arbitrary question.” e-mails, but you can only wait.

Success.
Success can take multiple paths, including, but not limited to:

• You are asked two questions. You get hired on the spot. You leave.
• You hit up an old employer. You interview well. You’re hired.

Know when they don’t know what they’re asking.
Also worth knowing is a list of questions that are illegal for an interviewer to ask you. If you are an Asian-faced female, it is likely that these questions will come out masked in casual language, sometimes prefaced with the quasi-disclaimer, “Can I ask you something? And it’s okay if this is too personal.”

Among the types of questions you should not hear – but let’s be honest, to not answer them would be awkward and leave a sour note on an interview – are:

• Where are you from? (American territories excluded.)
  
• Is your heritage from mainland China or Taiwan?
• So how would you feel being the only woman working with a bunch of male chauvinist pigs/dudes?