The laws of unemployment.

Being unemployed has its downsides. Consider these the “rites of passage” that toughen you up as you advance along in being Unemployed and Awesome. To cower in their weight is to fail. It’s just the burnt part of a cookie. It is still edible. It can still be learned from. For some people, it can still be enjoyed. The best thing I ever read from Ann Landers is, “This, too, shall pass.”

• Your latest rent check, though postmarked on time, will be misdirected for the first time in your year of residence, forcing you to cut another check for the regular amount plus a late penalty. The misdirected check will be discovered after your landlord has received your amended payment plus late fee, and though your landlord will list in your records that you have always paid on time, she or he will not refund you the penalty fee.
• Gas prices.
• Everyone will collect the money you owe at the same time. Hopefully you don’t have a long list of unfulfilled IOUs. You should not deny them any longer. Suck it up and hand it over.
• Your country of origin is in a recession.
• As you sit at home revising resumes and sending out cover letters, you are sucking up precious energy resources. Your PG&E bill increases to the highest it has ever been.
• You finally have the time to take your car in for its intermediate check-in, and the laundry list of tests costs about the same as a pair of designer shoes. If you’re lucky, all you’re paying for is the series of tests, and no further maintenance will be necessary.
• Gas prices.
• During your job search, you realize that you are not ready for anything resembling grad school in the next two years. Kiss all of the test preparation, study materials, registration, and mediocre test results good-bye. Positive: Being on your own makes you confident in breaking away from what you have successfully identified as something you merely thought was the right thing to do.
• The price of gas.